So you got booty hurt...

I guess you can call Fabian and I still newlyweds. We've been married for a year and a half but it's felt like so much longer (in a good way)! Weekly we're finding ourselves working through issues, most of the time they are individual issues that end up impacting us as a couple. I thought I would share with y'all one issue I am working through on. Daily.

The booty hurt.

Unfamiliar with that term? So was I until my husband so graciously taught me that phrase. According to Urban Dictionary a 'booty hurt' is when... something doesn't go your way or you don't have something that you want or it's something that makes you complain.

What a very accurate description.

So let's talk about this shall we? When something doesn't go my way it's because in my head I have planned out almost every scenario in life. I think there is a fine line between preparation and planning and I walk into the danger zone of over planning. When something doesn't go the way I planned it... BOOTY HURT. Or how about the classic scenario when you're trying to pick a restaurant to eat at? In reality I should realized how blessed I am to even have the option of multiple restaurants but instead I end up complaining because whoever you're with you can never come up with an answer and suggestions always get shot down... BOOTY HURT.

In my head here is what the booty hurt is saying,
"Ugh, I went to all this effort to plan something out so perfectly."
"Why can't you see how much I am doing to get this family to operate successfully?"
"So obviously, you don't even care."
"Why even ask me in the first place?"
"I might as well not even say anything."

The booty hurt can be so destructive. It's a selfish hurt that gives no grace or love for others involved and it destroys unity real fast! In this case it's my amazing husband that is affected by the booty hurt selfish destruction I ultimately bring upon myself.

I have been challenging myself to quickly identify these moments because real talk... I can stay silent and sit in my booty hurt mood for a while. Like we're talking days. And I know this because I have done it. When I identify a booty hurt I ask myself two questions,
1. Why am I upset?
2. Is this really a big deal or can I ignore it?

The next step is to always communicate to Fabian if something is really bothering me in that moment, and not wait to let him know. Otherwise... BIG booty hurt. We will work towards a solution together as quickly as possible. I think if you look at all the relationships in your life you could find some scenarios where you get booty hurt or may still be sitting in your booty hurt. I want to hear them! Tell me your booty hurt moments. Let's all work on them together!

-B